The Syrian-Americans

Mar 11

I was studying Literature and French Philosophy when the war came. I wanted to be an Arabic teacher. I didn’t want to be a soldier. I didn’t want to kill anyone. I had no interest in religion or politics. But all the young men were being forced to join the army, so when it came time to renew my papers, I ran. I only packed a small suitcase. I was planning to stay in Jordan for maybe a month until things calmed down. But when a month passed and the war hadn’t ended, I thought: ‘Maybe two months.’ Then: ‘Maybe three months.’ But after three months my mother told me that our house had been destroyed. She sent me a picture on the phone. Everything was rubble. There was nothing to go back to. But I had nothing in Jordan. I’d run out of money. I didn’t know anyone. I was homeless. I felt so alone that I wanted to kill myself. Then one day I tried to call a friend's phone but a strange voice answered.

“We met because of a wrong number. But we ended up speaking for a few minutes, and at the end of our conversation, he asked if he could call again. Soon he was calling me every day. It never felt romantic. I never felt that he had bad intentions. It just felt like he needed someone to talk to. He would tell me every little detail about his day. We’d talk for hours. Those phone calls were the highlight of my days. I was a refugee too. I was also lonely. So I’d sit in my room and wait for the phone to ring. Eventually we met in person. But I’m seven years older than him. I never once expected him to mention marriage. But then one day he asked if he could come speak to my family.”

“Ever since we had our first child, I stopped watching the TV. Everyday I used to watch the news and obsess over what was happening back in Syria. But once we had children, I had to realize that I couldn’t change anything, and the worrying wasn’t helping my family. We learned recently that we will be moving to a state called Michigan. I’m a pessimist, so I’m not going to believe it until we are on the plane. But my nephew is there and he says it’s like heaven. He says it’s very green and has nice nature. When we get to Michigan, I’m not going to turn on the television again. I’m done with religion and politics forever. I only want to worry about milk and diapers.”